Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
You dont lie about slip and slides
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize
