ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
