so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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