she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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