some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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