He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
