dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize
