ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
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