how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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