Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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