Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
