A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
We need to rekindle our bromance
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Randomize
