Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
