I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
