I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
