I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished�
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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