i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
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