Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
You are the jesus of drinking
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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