I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
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