hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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