I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize
