paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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