he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Randomize
