Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
