maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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