there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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