I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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