i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize
