Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I have aggressive nipples.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
