Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
