I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
