R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
