we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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