That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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