so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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