Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize
