one might say we're banned from that church
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize
