For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
third nipple confirmed
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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