I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
