you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I would fuck him just for his dog
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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