Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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