She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
