Im at strip club and am horny
I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Randomize
