no, he came in my armpit
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
