It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I am mentally ready for anal.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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