omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
