Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize
