Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
that may or may not have been my penis.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
