Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(678): View more from Georgia

she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy

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(602): View more from Arizona

I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.

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(605): View more from South Dakota

you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar

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(859): View more from Kentucky

She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.

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(240): View more from Maryland

Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence

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(480): View more from Arizona

It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make

Fav 3 803 569
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(808): View more from Hawaii

In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.

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(630): View more from Illinois

I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"

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(973): View more from New Jersey

Pillow talk?

(862): View more from New Jersey

can't do it. no eye contact either.

(973): View more from New Jersey

Where have you been all my life

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