is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
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